Facing the Distorted Masculine

This month’s womb healing journey brought into vivid focus the intricate interplay between the universal energies of the masculine and feminine that reside within me, and how these energies relate directly to my sense of purpose in life. A poignant moment of self-reflection arose when I realized that many people describe me using qualities that are often associated with the masculine archetype—such as light, direct manifestation, and an unwavering commitment to truth. At first glance, I found myself resisting this characterization. I made it wrong in my mind, feeling an instinctive aversion to being primarily associated with traits that I believed belonged to the masculine realm. This internal conflict began to trigger a cascade of questions about my ability to fully hold space for womb healing if I wasn’t perceived as embodying the emotional depth and darkness that are traditionally linked to the feminine energy. As I sat with these complex feelings, I found myself becoming increasingly confused and entangled in my own thoughts. I have always held the belief that every individual embodies both feminine and masculine traits universally, so why was I viewing my stronger association with one aspect as a negative thing that needed to be corrected?

In an effort to explore these feelings further, I initiated a visualization exercise where I invited a representation of the masculine to sit in front of me. The images that emerged during this exercise caused me significant physical discomfort and unease. Interestingly, many of these images were of women from my life, women whom I respect and admire. This realization struck me as profound; I was witnessing a distorted version of masculinity that I had internalized. It was also fascinating to note that many of the individuals who appeared in my visualization are those I believe genuinely love and value me. This helped me understand how distorted masculine energy—characterized by control, suppression, or emotional disconnection—can inflict harm regardless of its intention or origin. This distortion often infiltrates the body, mind, or womb space, leaving lasting and sometimes invisible effects. As someone who has frequently been harmed by more overt manifestations of distorted masculine energy, it was profoundly eye-opening to receive images of individuals who care about me deeply yet still embody aspects of this distortion.

This experience reminded me that the distorted masculine resides within each of us, lurking beneath the surface, and that we all have the potential to cause harm or be harmed by it if it is not expressed in its divine form. I also needed to take a hard look at how my own distorted masculine energy might have unknowingly harmed those around me. This realization was challenging and somewhat painful, particularly considering the history of distortion and harm I have encountered from the masculine in my life. However, it was also liberating in its own right. I began to see that by healing my relationship with the masculine—both within myself and in the collective consciousness—I could achieve a deeper level of healing for my womb and the essence of my feminine being.

Through this process, I came to a profound understanding that the masculine traits within me were not inherently flawed or negative; rather, they had simply been influenced by the distorted expressions of masculine energy I had experienced throughout my life. The healing journey wasn’t about rejecting the masculine altogether; it was about transforming its distortions and recognizing its divine qualities as a sacred ally to the feminine. This shift in perspective allowed me to embrace the idea that both energies hold value and significance in their own right.

This clarity shifted something deep within me, allowing me to see that my divine feminine essence was indeed present; she just could not step into the fullness of her form while the distorted masculine was running the show. I began to perceive the divine masculine energy as essential to womb healing—a necessary structure of protection and focus that enables the feminine to thrive, create, and embody her true self fully. This realization was both edgy and liberating, as it required me to confront my fears and biases. Given my past experiences with distorted masculine energy, embracing its divine form required a significant amount of courage and vulnerability. Yet, it opened a pathway to deeper healing for my womb and my feminine essence that I had long sought.

The journey also deepened my understanding that masculine and feminine energies are universal forces that exist beyond the confines of gender. They flow within each of us, intricately shaped by our individual experiences, deeply held beliefs, and the cultural influences that surround us. Cultivating awareness of these dynamics is crucial to how we embody masculine energy within ourselves and how we receive it from others in our lives. It is not merely about exalting one energy over the other but about restoring their inherent harmony. The divine masculine, when healed and embraced, creates the safety and structure that allows the feminine to flow freely, while the divine feminine nurtures and guides the masculine toward integrity, purpose, and authenticity. This mutual support forms the foundation for profound healing and wholeness within individuals, relationships, and the collective community.

By embracing this integration of energies, I am learning to embody the divine aspects of both the masculine and feminine energies within myself while also helping others to do the same. I am beginning to trust in the transformative power of balance and partnership, recognizing that this journey is not just about me but about contributing to a larger movement toward healing and wholeness in the world around us. This newfound understanding empowers me to navigate my relationships with greater clarity and compassion, fostering an environment where both energies can coexist in harmony, ultimately leading to a more enriched and fulfilling life experience.